Des Geraty to strike for 30% less strike action, pay hike.

Mr Des Geraghty: to strike

The leader of Irelands largest Union (SIPTU), Mr. Des Geraghty is to go on strike for 30% less strike action and a pay hike. Following on from the secondary school teachers rejection of a proposed wage agreement, which was described as "pap", primary school teachers, cabin crew, bin-men and restaurant staff are to follow suit with further strike action, demanding better pay and conditions.

Mr. Geraghty made this shock announcement at a press conference where he was supposed to be commenting on the secondary school teachers' rejection. He stated, "I'm absolutely knackered after the taxi strike and with all these other eejits joining in, I'll be bet."

"This wasn't included in my roster plan", he continued. "For example, I thought my job brief was to sell the hopes and dreams of the ordinary workers of Ireland short through willing submission to government. Now it turns out I have to co-ordinate strikes and represent these dossers. In relation to my pay hike, I don't think any other leader has had to preside over as many strikes and industrial strife as I have. That just shows that my productivity is up."

The Taoiseach and the Minister for Enterprise, Trade and Employment have welcomed the move. Through a gut laugh that lasted almost 10 minutes and with squeals of delight in the background, Bertie Ahern said, "the government are behind Mr. Geraghty all the way. I mean, if it was us who paid him, we'd give it to him."

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